My ex will not follow the custody or access order. How do I enforce it?

You fought for an access order, or agreed one by consent. Now the weekend handover keeps being cancelled, calls go unanswered, or the child is not returned on time. An order on paper means little unless it is followed. Here is how the court can help.

Why is a custody order binding?

The court may place a child in the custody of either parent, or in exceptional cases another person, with the child's welfare as the paramount consideration (s.88 of the Law Reform (Marriage and Divorce) Act 1976 (LRA)). An order may be made subject to conditions, including where the child lives, visits or access by the other parent, temporary care and control, and a prohibition on taking the child out of Malaysia (s.89(2)). These are orders of court, and disobeying them can be contempt.

What can I do when the order is breached?

1. Keep a record: dates and times of missed handovers, messages, and witnesses.
2. Write to the other parent, ideally through lawyers, reminding them of the order and the specific breaches.
3. Apply to the court that made the order. Depending on the case, you can ask the court to: - clarify or tighten the terms, such as fixed times, a neutral handover place, or make-up access; - vary the conditions or the custody arrangement under sections 89 and 96 where there is a material change in circumstances; or - begin committal proceedings for contempt.

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How does committal for contempt work?

Committal is governed by Order 52 of the Rules of Court 2012. In general terms:

• The order must have been properly served, usually personally, and its terms must be clear, so that the other parent knew exactly what was required. Orders are commonly endorsed with a penal notice warning of the consequences of disobedience.
• The applicant generally seeks the court's leave first and then serves the application with supporting affidavits.
• The breach must be proved to a high standard, and it must be wilful.
• If contempt is proved, the court can impose penalties including a fine or committal to prison. The court may also give the contemnor a chance to purge the contempt.

Because the consequences are serious, courts treat committal as a remedy of last resort, especially where children are involved.

What will the court consider?

Throughout, the court is guided by the welfare of the child. If the refusal is based on genuine safety concerns, such as violence or substance abuse, the court will examine those concerns. If it is simply obstruction, the court may adjust the arrangements, including custody itself in serious cases.

What should I do first?

1. Read the order carefully: are the access terms specific enough to enforce?
2. Comply yourself: be on time, and keep your side of the order.
3. Document every breach calmly and factually.
4. Avoid confrontations at handovers; involve neutral venues where needed.
5. Get advice on the best application: clarification, variation or committal.

Example

A father's order gives him alternate weekends. For two months the mother cancels each visit at the last minute. He keeps a log and her messages, and writes through his lawyer. When the cancellations continue, he applies for specific handover terms and make-up access, and gives notice that committal proceedings will follow further breaches. The court sets fixed times and a neutral handover point.

Common mistakes

• Withholding maintenance in retaliation, which breaches another order.
• Taking the child without agreement or an order.
• Relying on a vague order, such as "reasonable access", without seeking specific terms.
• Arguing in front of the child at handovers.

When to speak to a lawyer

Speak to a lawyer when breaches become a pattern, or if a child is not returned. See our family and divorce page; you can also contact us.

Frequently asked questions

Can I call the police if the child is not returned?

In urgent cases involving safety, call the police. For ordinary breaches of access terms, the court is usually the place to enforce the order.

Will the court change custody because of breaches?

It can, in serious cases, if it is in the child's welfare, but usually it first tightens or clarifies the terms.

Is a consent order enforceable in the same way?

Yes. A consent order is an order of court and can be enforced like any other.

Sources & fact check

Legal points in this article were checked against the primary sources below. The law can change; this is general information, not legal advice.

1. Law Reform (Marriage and Divorce) Act 1976 (Act 164), including sections 83, 88, 93, 95 and 96, AGC Laws of Malaysia
2. Rules of Court 2012 (P.U.(A) 205/2012), text published by the Malaysian Bar, including Orders 12, 13, 18, 19 and 93
3. Office of the Chief Registrar, Federal Court of Malaysia (Judiciary portal)

Fact-checked on 17 Oct 2026